I had two of the most bizzarre conversations whilst on my way out in the last two days.
The first was with a caucasian friend who commented that she had to get her hair dyed this evening. Off hand I causally commented "Is that not your natural hair colour?" and the look of embarrassment on her face was identical to the one I would have had when colleagues would say to me "Isn't that your real hair?". I was absoloutely flabbergasted at how embarrassed she was, she quickly laughed it off and changed topic but it was amazing to me how personal a question that was. I had no idea that "white girls" got embarrassed about that kind of thing. Dye commercials etc are common place around us constantly, I didn't really think it would be a problem to ask something like that. Obviously I was mistaken and it was akin to asking a black girl "Is that your real hair", which I think is quite a personal question. I do have a friend that will tell everyone that will listen that she is wearing a weave, but most girls I know dont really mention it unless asked and their caucasian counterparts just assume that this is your hair.
The second conversation was this morning walking through that horrible weather we had. It was a drizzling a bit and I waved to a neighbour who immediately started to explain, although I hadn't asked, why she was wearing a rain hood. Her hair although blond and straight was in reality brown and curly!, though I had never seen it in this state. And if the rain got on it, it would be twice the size by the time she reached work!! Again I was astounded that she was so embarrassed by her hair that she felt the need to tell me this. To be quite honest if it had been raining a little bit harder I would have been running for cover myself. Get my hair wet... I don't think so. She then proceeded to tell me that she woud love to have hair like Tina, my neighbour on the other side who had long blonde straight hair, exactly like the hair I thought this other neighbour had, so that she didn't have to constantly straighten and thin hers with special scissors.
Cor Blimey I thought I had problems.
This idea that its just black women who are ashamed of their hair and cover it up because they want to be white is in my opinion a myth. All women have issues with some part of their bodies and none of them are happy with their hair. Apparently Gwyneth Paltrow is a slave to hair straightening irons. Frankly we are all, Black, white, japanese and indian trying to live up to some arian ideal. Blonde flowing hair like Miss Piggy.
This is just my personal observation but it is reinforced for me daily, that this isn't just a problem that black women face! But that we should all be happy with ourselves.
Embrace Your Inner AfroDeity!
Leilu
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